On Being Married...

A few months ago I wrote a post titled "On Being Engaged..." that expressed how much I hated being engaged. Well lets just say it got way more attention than I anticipated and I'm sure many people got the absolute wrong idea about me and my relationship with Matt. At the time I wrote it, I was incredibly frustrated with school, depressed from all the snow, and just missing Matt more than is healthy. To be honest, I just really, really wanted to be married, and so I wanted to write a so called "sequel" to my previous post with a more positive outlook called...

 Why Being Married Rocks

I would like to start with a disclaimer - I haven't been married for that long, but in the short time that I have been Mrs. Matt Billings, I would like to think I have a very small taste of what married life is like (without kids - thank heavens!) and so far, it rocks.

1.) No more goodbyes.  The absolute WORST thing about dating is saying goodbye at the end of the night and going your separate ways.  Now don't get me wrong, some nights it was actually a relief that I got to send Prince Charming home because he was driving me absolute bonkers, but majority of the time saying goodbye was the hardest part of the day... er, night.  Whatever. I use to tell people that Matt and I's relationship was defined by "goodbyes", since we had a long distance relationship and to every wonderful "hello" there was a sad and depressing "goodbye" that always managed to make my mascara run. Well after the "I do's", the only "goodbye" I say is when he goes to work, and that's nothing compared to the previous goodbyes.  No more kisses on the doorstep - only kisses goodnight while he's holding me tight in our bed.

2.) I got myself a hott date EVERY weekend.  Matt is HOTT.  Like dang hott. And I'm a very lucky girl in the fact that I get to go on a date with him every weekend.  My dating years seemed to have a pattern of either feast or famine when it came to getting dates - I would have a date every weekend for a few months and then I would have nothing for double the amount of time.  It was frustrating, especially when I went to BYU expecting dates all the time and NEVER got asked out. (that's right folks, I was the girl who went to BYU and never got one date, but that's another story for another post).  It rocks to have a so-called built in date every weekend.  Even if it is just sitting at home having a Harry Potter marathon and baking cookies, it's still wonderful to know you have plans every weekend that are not watching sappy chick flicks with your roommates and then planning your perfect future wedding on Pinterest.

3.) No more thoughts about breaking up.  This one is entirely me...  During the year that Matt and I dated, he thought of breaking things off with me ONCE. That's it, just once. Incredible.  Being the heartless person I can be, I can honestly say that I thought about breaking it up with him many, many times - typically after a fight or I felt like I wasn't getting enough attention.  When I married Matt, I pretty much said, "This is it Shanette.  Either it works or you make it work." No more thoughts about "breaking it off" with Matt.  Some may say this is a con to being married, but in my opinion its a most definite pro.  I know that no matter how bad things may get, both of us are willing to sit down and work it out.  There's no going back on this and there is no end to our relationship.

4.)  Sex.  Ok, don't freak out!  I won't go into explicit detail, but just know that it's good. Really, really good.  There are so many health benefits to having sex - better blood pressure, less stress, better sleep, smaller chance of prostate cancer - and so much more.  It's such a wonderful thing that gets degraded WAY too much and people just need to calm down about it.  I used to think that there was only one kind of sex - that lustful kind, ya know, that kind that you see in all the movies  where people can't keep their hands to themselves because the other is so dang hott (like Matt is).  Well I was wrong.  There's another kind of sex that is more mental than physical and we have it just to feel close to each other. It's wonderful. Like, I just can't put it into words.  Sex is good my friends.

There are so many other things that I could write about but these are the truly wonderful things about being married that I love and I know that you have a life you need to get back to so I'll wrap things up.  I'm so grateful for the opportunity I had to get married at such a young age and I'm so happy that I get to spend the rest of my life with Matt.  Please know that it's not always sunshine and daisies for us though, because we do fight, in fact ALL the time, but we fight for each other even more than we fight with each other and that's what keeps us together. I'm sure that if Matt and I were to make a Pro/Con list for the other, his list would have many more cons than pros.  All in all, I couldn't be happier.  Perhaps all the frustrations I had while being engaged were worth for what I got in the end. I love you Matt.

An Attitude of Gratitude

It's the beginning of the end of another year of life and I look back and think of all the amazing things that have happened to me within the last 11 months - I got a half tuition scholarship from the BYU Life Sciences college, fell in complete love over the summer, turned the perfect age of 21, was proposed to on my 21st birthday, and  am now planning the southern wedding of my dreams for next June.  Can life get any better?

I don't mean to brag and say that I have a better life than you, but instead I want to say that I really do have A LOT to be grateful for.  Many of my friends are doing a "30 Days of Thanksgiving" challenge on Facebook where they post something that they are grateful for each day.  I love this idea and I love reading all the different, and sometimes unique, things people are grateful for everyday, but instead of me joining the bandwagon this year, I want to just write about one thing in particular that I'm grateful for - love.

Typically when one hears the word "love" it is usually used in a romantic context.  I feel like many people forget that there are countless different types of love though in addition to just romantic, such as friendship love, parental love, sibling love, puppy love, etc. that people feel everyday but take for granted and overlook.   I just want to express how grateful I am for all the different forms of love I have in my life.  I'm grateful for the parental love that my wonderful parents freely give me each and everyday.  They have been so kind to me and they have truly given me wings to fly.  I would be nothing without them and am so grateful for the example they have set for me all these years and especially grateful that they never fought in front of me. They support me 100% in all my decisions and have never told me what to be or what to do with my life, but rather to do my best and choose what will make me happy. I honestly have the best parents a girl could ask for.  I'm grateful for the singling love that I receive from my brothers and sisters.  My childhood was completed by them and I can't express how much joy they have given me. It is so wonderful to know that you have automatic "built-in" friends that have you back no matter what, even when all your other friends walk out on you.  Matthew, Ryan, Brenton and Melissa, y'all are the best! :)

I'm grateful for this new romantic love I have.  Friends, I cannot convey in words how much I love Matt Billings, but I hope you just get a inkling of an idea from this post.  I am the luckiest girl - I have found a man who loves me for being me. I have found a man who knows the good, the bad, and the ugly sides of me and still wants me.  I have found a man who respects me, cares for me, has the same morals as me and same goals as I do.  I have found a man who would die to make me happy.  I have found my missing puzzle piece, my better half, my best friend.  I am SO grateful for this man... I wish you could understand! He is by no means perfect but he is perfect for me.  I've dated my fair share of "men" in the past and the more men I met, the more I loved my dog. I honestly didn't think that there was a man out there for me, but he was right in my own backyard the entire time!  I know this man better than anyone else and I can honestly say that the more I talk to him and the longer I am with him, the more I fall in love with him.  I have been blessed with the opportunity to get married at a young age to a handsome, fit, loyal man and I can't think of no other way God could be any kinder to me.  I am so blessed and I am so happy.  Matt Billings, you are my world. I love you with all my heart and we will have a marriage and love that people will look to and admire.  I am so excited to spend the rest of my existence sealed to you.

Finally and most importantly, I am grateful for the love that my Heavenly Father gives me.  Everything I am and everything I have done has been by the grace of Him.  I think my love for Matt is unfathomable, but just imagine the love Heavenly Father has for you and me.  Everything I have is from Him and I know I can never pay Him back even a fraction of all he has given me but I can be obedient and serve others and make the world a better place to show my love to Him.

I'm grateful for love and the power it has.  It's softened this girls heart and I believe that if we all showed  just a little bit more love for one another, then miracles would be seen every day. Have a Happy Thanksgiving y'all!